Hosting guests at your home overnight is an incredibly generous deed that warrants gratitude and acknowledgement. Just because you’re opening up your place to others, however, doesn’t mean you have the right to treat them poorly.
“The fact is everyone likes to be treated with respect and kindness,” Jackie Vernon-Thompson, founder ofFrom the Inside-Out School of Etiquette, told HuffPost. “Therefore, there are a few etiquette protocols that a host should consider to ensure their overnight guest feels comfortable, welcomed, respected and appreciated.”
The guidelines may vary a bit based on your relationship to the guest in question and the nature of their visit. After all, there’s a difference between entertaining your in-laws for two weeks and letting your childhood best friend crash on your couch one night after they’ve had a little too much wine.
But whatever the circumstances, you don’t have to spend a fortune or give up precious hours of your busy life to be a considerate overnight host. Just think about the Golden Rule and some basic dos and don’ts ― especially the don’ts.
Below, Vernon-Thompson and other etiquette experts share some common rude behaviors when hosting guests and their advice for avoiding these mistakes.
Not Providing Clean Sheets Or Towels
Even if you aren’t the type to scrub the house from top to bottom, cook special multi-course meals and put out vases of fresh flowers for your overnight guests, you do need to provide the essentials. That means clean sheets and towels so that they may comfortably sleep and shower during their stay.
“Freshly laundered linens and towels should be easily accessible,”said Tami Claytor, the etiquette coach behindAlways Appropriate Image & Etiquette Consulting.
The most basic need of an overnight guest is a comfortable (and ideally private) place to sleep, so make that a priority. Test out that pullout couch or old cot beforehand.
“Do a sleepover in your own guest room so you know if the mattress is comfortable, the sheets need repair or should be replaced and the duvet needs to go to the cleaners,”saidDiane Gottsman, the author of “Modern Etiquette for a Better Life” and founder of The Protocol School of Texas.
If for some reason you aren’t able to provide clean sheets or towels to your guest, ask them in advance if they can pack their own. But guests shouldn’t be expected to bring their own toilet paper, hand soap and bath products ― you should provide those.
“Your home should be a makeshift hotel suite for the night,” Vernon-Thompson said. “Supplying these items translates to your guest that you thought of their comfort.”
Hovering
“Allow the guest some down time,”said Jodi R.R. Smith, president of Massachusetts-basedMannersmith Etiquette Consulting. “If the guest excuses themself to go to their room to read or nap, do not listen at the door or tap gently to see if they are actually awake. If the guest is checking their mobile or responding to an email, do not ask each time what it was about.”
It’s reasonable to need a little alone time, so don’t expect your guest to spend every waking moment of their stay hanging out with you. Give them their space, and trust that everything is fine.
